No one starts a relationship expecting it to end. When it does, the practical questions arrive fast. Who stays in the home. How the bills get paid. What happens with the children. What you are actually entitled to.
The answers depend far more on your legal status than most people expect, and the gap between what people assume and what the law provides causes real financial harm every year. Understanding where you stand early gives you a far better chance of a fair outcome. Speaking to Family Law Partners or another family law specialist at the outset can help you avoid decisions that are difficult to undo later.
This guide covers the position in England and Wales. Scotland and Northern Ireland have separate family law systems, and some of the rules below work differently there.
Your rights depend on your legal status
There is no such thing as a common law marriage. It does not exist in England and Wales and never has, no matter how long you have lived together, whether you have children, or whether you share a bank account.
This matters because married couples and civil partners have access to a broad set of financial claims when they separate. Cohabiting couples do not. Two people in outwardly identical situations can end up with completely different outcomes purely because one couple signed a marriage register and the other did not.
So the first question to answer is not what feels fair. It is what legal category you fall into.
If you are married or in a civil partnership
Since April 2022, England and Wales has operated a no-fault divorce system. Neither of you has to prove wrongdoing or blame the other. There is a minimum period of 20 weeks between applying and being able to apply for a conditional order, then a further 6 weeks and 1 day before the final order.
Separately from the divorce itself, you have the right to apply for a financial order. That can cover:
- The family home and any other property
- Savings, investments and business interests
- Pensions, including pension sharing orders
- Maintenance for you and for your children
The court works through a list of factors set out in the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973, including the length of the marriage, each person’s income and earning capacity, contributions made to the family, and future needs. The welfare of any child under 18 comes first.
One point is routinely missed. Getting divorced does not, by itself, end your financial claims against each other. Without a financial order approved by the court, a claim can in principle be brought years later. If you want a clean break, it has to be documented properly.
If you are living together
Cohabiting couples are the fastest-growing family type in the UK, with more than 3.5 million cohabiting couple families. The law has not kept pace.
If you separate, you have no automatic right to a share of your partner’s property, savings, income or pension, regardless of how long you were together. What you may have instead:
- A property claim. If you contributed to a home held in your partner’s sole name, you may be able to establish a beneficial interest under the Trusts of Land and Appointment of Trustees Act 1996. These claims turn on evidence of what was agreed and what was paid, and they are harder and more expensive to run than a divorce financial claim.
- Claims for your children. Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989 allows a parent to seek financial provision for a child, which can include a lump sum or the use of a property until the child reaches adulthood. This is provision for the child, not for you.
- Child maintenance. Available through the Child Maintenance Service regardless of marital status.
If you are currently living together and not planning to marry, a cohabitation agreement or a declaration of trust recording who owns what is far cheaper than litigating the question later.
Your rights as a parent
Parental responsibility gives you a say in major decisions about your child, including schooling, medical treatment and where they live. Mothers have it automatically. Fathers have it if they were married to the mother, or if they are named on the birth certificate for a birth registered from 1 December 2003 onwards.
There is no legal presumption that children’s time should be split equally. The court’s guiding principle is the welfare of the child, and there is a separate presumption that involving both parents benefits the child unless there is a risk of harm.
Most parents never need a court. If you cannot agree, you will usually be required to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting before you can apply for a child arrangements order. Exemptions apply, including where there has been domestic abuse.
Everything the original guidance says about protecting children still holds. Keep arguments away from them. Do not ask them to take sides. Hold routines, meals and school activities steady where you can. None of that is a legal right, but courts do look at which parent has supported the child’s relationship with the other.
The family home
If you are married or in a civil partnership and the home is in your partner’s sole name, you have home rights. You can occupy the property and you can register a notice against the title at HM Land Registry, which prevents a sale going through without your knowledge. This is worth doing early if you have any concern about it.
If you are not married, your position depends on whether you are on the title and, if not, whether you can establish a beneficial interest. Being on the mortgage, paying towards it or paying for renovations does not automatically give you ownership, though it can form part of the evidence.
Looking Ahead
The end of a relationship is difficult, but it does not have to leave you powerless. Find out which legal category you are in, get advice before you make irreversible decisions, and keep your paperwork in order. Every situation is different, and early advice usually costs far less than fixing a rushed agreement afterwards.
Disclaimer
This article is for general information only and does not constitute legal advice. If you are facing separation or divorce, please seek advice from a qualified family law solicitor about your own circumstances.
